Do you know the difference between Show vs Tell? Showing immerses the reader in the story, whereas telling can make the reader feel as if they are being talked at.
Showing techniques:
- Appeal to the reader’s senses
- Use dialogue
- Use strong verbs
- Focus on action
- Avoid adverbs
To put the techniques into practice try to write a few lines in relation to the below prompt.
The prompt for the exercise is “Tracey followed Michael into the building”. Can you describe what happens next using the Show (not Tell) techniques?
Writing exercise
Here is the Tell version (i.e. what not to do)
Tracey, who was tall with black hair, followed Michael into the building. Tracey was confused about where she was. It was warm and dark in the room. After looking around she realised it was a bakery. The floor was covered in flour and she could tell which direction Michael had taken from his footprints.
Show version
Tracey followed Michael into the building, ducking her head, her raven hair swinging, folding her long legs beneath her to avoid hitting the doorframe. Her brow furrowed as she looked around her.
Burlap sacks, their mysterious contents tied into knots, stood in uniform rows to her left. Tracey could hear the clickety-clack of rhythmic metal on metal. Glancing to her right, she saw whisks beating together in perfect, hypnotic synchronisation, their tips dipping into steel bellies, the glint of each bowl subdued by the dim bulbs overhead. The earthy aroma of freshly baked bread hung in the air and she could feel heat emanating from a bank of ovens obscured in the shadows. A zigzag of Michael’s footprints were already etched on the dusty floor beckoning her to his location.
What a difference it makes to take the time to use adjectives to set the scene and appeal to the senses.
The next time you pick up a book see if you can observe the Show (not tell) techniques being applied.
Happy writing!